Chapter 36: Chasing the Light

Tan Mo wasn't very interested, but didn't refuse right away, and the physics teacher had already started talking at length.

"I've taken students who have won before, but Tan Mo, your physics skills are even better than those of your former classmates! Once you make the provincial team, you can go to the winter camp, and if you win first prize at the winter camp, you can go to the national team! The national team will be taught by the best competition teachers in the country, and after two months of training, the best will be selected to represent the country in the International Physics Olympiad!"

The more the physics teacher spoke, the more excited he became, as if Tan Mo had actually won a gold medal in the International Physics Olympiad.

But Tan Mo spat out two words in a cold voice.

"No go."

It was good that the physics teacher didn't say anything, but when it came to "training" for the national team, Tan Mo's already uninteresting thoughts became even less interesting.

The physics teacher's enthusiasm froze for a moment.

The class teacher gestured to the physics teacher to take it easy and took over, speaking to Tan Mo slowly and in a coaxing tone of voice.

"After so many exams, several teachers are very amazed at your talent in maths and physics, that's why they want you to give it a try", the class teacher continued as he sat down on a chair not far from Tan Mo, "The content of knowledge you have mastered is too advanced for high school students, and it is indeed a waste of time for you to be here every day in Instead of wasting your time, you should go to a higher level of education and acquire a more sophisticated knowledge."

The class teacher felt that Tan Mo was not interested in anything, but he was so good at maths and physics, so his talent was one thing and his love for it must be another, so he wanted to use that aspect to attract Tan Mo.

As a result, Tan Mo heard the same two words, "No", and tried to leave directly afterwards.

"There will also be a lot of benefits to entering the competition, Tan Mo I know you don't like being around your classmates and sitting in class every day, and if you do win, you'll be able to totally focus on just what you like and not have to sit in class with the other students; and if you do win a prize later on, a first prize, then you'll be guaranteed a place at the best university straight away and won't have to come to to class, don't you want to?"

This is so appealing to students, especially Tan Mo who, after all, hates school life more than anything else, right?

Unfortunately, Tan Mo is still aloof, or so it would seem if he could make faces.

You are annoying.

"I don't want to," Tan Mo said coldly, pausing to add, "I want to go to class."

He is not interested in winning prizes or training, he can come to class if he wants to, or not if he doesn't want to, and no one can force him to, he is only here because Qiao Lan is here, and he is not interested in being sent to university, even if he is, if Qiao Lan is not at that university in the future...

Tan Mo froze abruptly at the thought.

Tan Mo seems to have realised at this time that he had no concrete plans for much of his future afterwards, and if he had to have one, it would be Qiao Lan.

Because she was here, he didn't want to go to some physics competition.

Because I don't know where Qiao Lan will be in the future, I won't decide prematurely where I will be.

Without hesitation at all, he just naturally wrote down the name of a person in a blank picture of his future.

Qiao Lan.

There is only this one name and nothing else.

It was the first time that Tan Mo felt so clearly that he had developed a strong sense of dependence on Qiao Lan, of following him.

The phrase, follow the light, suddenly occurred to him.

There is no need to think or discern, Qiao Lan is his light, and where the light is, he is.

And by leaving the light, life would return to the darkness it once was, perhaps even more difficult, and he suddenly remembered a poem by Emily Dickinson.

Had I not seen the Sun

I could have borne the shade

I could have endured the darkness

If I had never seen the sun

But Tan Mo could not help thinking of the last two lines of the poem.

But Light a newer Wilderness

My Wilderness has made

But shines my sunshine

A new wilderness created

Tan Mo couldn't figure out what the words meant, all he knew was that he couldn't live without this light, this sunlight, like a grass that can't live without sunlight.

Without light, it will die.

The class teacher had an unexpected look of surprise: ......??

Tan Mo didn't want to go to class and didn't like the hustle and bustle of school life, but what happened? He also felt that entering the competition was like a tailor-made life path for Tan Mo, but Tan Mo refused so decisively.

Tan Mo had no need to satisfy the class teacher's curiosity and turned around after reconfirming that he would not be going.

The Physics teacher and the class teacher looked at each other and finally sighed to each other before the class teacher grabbed the book from the table and hurried in Tan Mo's direction as well.

The next class is a language class for Class 14 and he is going to be there too.

The homeroom teacher walked quickly and reached Tan Mo not far from him in a few steps. He persuaded Tan Mo a few more times without giving up, and finally even made a speech about doing honour to the school and doing honour to himself, but Tan Mo did not even turn his head.

Forget it, the class teacher shook his head, "Right there is one more thing, I forgot to tell you, our school has set up a scholarship mechanism, did you know that."

"I don't know."

"I knew you wouldn't know", the class teacher laughed cheerfully, "Our school has set up a scholarship system to encourage students to study, with one first prize, three second prizes and six third prizes, which are determined according to the last two final exams of the two semesters of each year. The first prize has five thousand dollars, the second prize is three thousand dollars, and the third prize is one thousand dollars, if there is no accident, the first prize should be you."

The first prize was awarded to the student and the class teacher who brought the first prize student to the class felt that it was too easy for Tan Mo to win the first prize, after all, the marks in every exam were so high.

As he said that, he turned his head and suddenly found Tan Mo sitting still in his chair, "What's wrong?"

Lost something?

Tan Mo looked up thoughtfully, "Winning first prize, what are the conditions."

"And you're worried about that, you'll be fine." , the class teacher was amused, "It's all about the final exam results for the last of the two semesters, and the first prize goes to whoever has the highest score when the two results are added together."

Tan Mo will get a first prize, Qiao Lan and Chen Yaoyang will get a second prize, and with a little more luck Pei Ning or Song Yao will get a third prize at the end of the semester.

That would have been so dignified for him.

The more the class teacher thought about it, the happier she was, she subconsciously tried to reach out and pat Tan Mo on the shoulder, but her hand went out and back in, "The bell will ring soon, get back to class."

Tan Mo returned to the classroom and Qiao Lan looked at the time, it was almost time for class, Tan Mo had been out for a long time.

"Is the class teacher looking for you for something important," Qiao Lan asked Tan Mo.

"No," Tan Mo said, thinking better of it and speaking clearly to Qiao Lan, summarising in a few words what the physics teacher had said, and his own attitude.

Qiao Lan nodded, no wonder the class teacher was beaming with joy.

But Tan Mo's refusal was entirely expected and she didn't really want Tan Mo to go.

When Qiao Lan thinks of Tan Mo's two-year absence and the severe depression she suffers in the book, she feels it is better to keep Tan Mo safe and sound under her nose. I've heard that students who take part in competitions usually have to train intensively, and Tan Mo is not in a fit state to do so, so who knows what might happen.

The award is an honour, but safety is more important.

He sat silently for a long time, wanting to ask Qiao Lan something, but this was an English class, and English teachers never allow anyone to talk in class.

Tan Mo turned his head to look at Qiao Lan, who was secretly doing maths in English class, took out a piece of paper from his bag, wrote a few words and silently pushed it over to Qiao Lan.

Qiao Lan was surprised to see this little note for a long time before she took it.

Tan Mo asked her if she wanted him to go to the competition.

Qiao Lan puts pen to paper quickly and then pushes the note back.

--don't want to.

Tan Mo stared steadily at the clean, crisp words on the note, and after a long moment stuck the note solemnly in his book, then plopped himself down on the table and surreptitiously, couldn't stop his face from twitching.

It was a still slightly odd, but uncontrolled smile from the heart.