Chapter 87: 第 87 章

Not expecting Lu Heyang to make such a request, Xu Ze stood still in a daze for a while. He did not say 'all right' and did not give any other answer — he only turned back and took his place beside the hospital bed.

Lu Heyang released his hand. 'There's a chair beside you,' he said.

To Xu Ze the sentence was the same as a command to sit. He drew the chair over quietly and settled into it.

It was dim again, and quiet, and the space held only the two of them. It should have been Xu Ze's comfort zone, and yet suddenly he wanted to switch on the light, to look carefully at Lu Heyang's face — to see whether he had lost weight, whether he was tired.

'Are you uncomfortable?' Xu Ze asked.

'Mm.'

'The nursing notes show medication was taken a little over ten minutes ago,' Xu Ze said. 'Once it takes effect, it will be a little better.'

Lu Heyang's voice was a touch hoarse. 'It used to be like this, but this time it doesn't seem to be doing much. I may need to take a few more.'

'You can't.' Xu Ze's expression turned serious at once. 'It would damage the gland and the brain.'

The cost of cultivating a single outstanding Air Force pilot was staggering; whoever diagnosed and treated Lu Heyang had to be among the very finest military doctors in the hospital, in the entire League — every dose had been calculated with precision. Half a pill more was not permitted.

'Really? I learned something.' Lu Heyang said it with equal seriousness.

Xu Ze did not believe he could be in the mood for jokes in a body so unwell, nor did he believe Lu Heyang could truly be unaware — and so he fell to thinking.

Suddenly he heard Lu Heyang's hand make a small scraping sound against the side of the bed. Xu Ze stopped thinking and leaned forward a little. 'Looking for something?'

'Mm, looking for —' The sensor on his fingers met the hard edge of the bed with a click. 'Your hand.'

Because Lu Heyang was searching, Xu Ze gave his hand over without a second thought. He felt Lu Heyang's scalding fingertips brush across the back of his hand, cover the whole of it, and then close into a tight grip.

Xu Ze held his breath. He did not know what the right response was, nor could he guess the reason behind Lu Heyang's gesture; while a great many thoughts occupied his mind and came to nothing, his body obeyed an older instinct — under Lu Heyang's palm he turned his hand over, returned the grip, palm pressed to palm.

It had been so long since they had held hands with such gravity that even Xu Ze could no longer count the years. And yet he could still compare with perfect clarity how much larger Lu Heyang's hand had grown, and where new calluses had appeared.

Some memories never lose their colour. They are only hidden away, and hidden well.

'Will it interfere with your work?' Lu Heyang asked, as though some last thread of clear will still remained in him.

'No. I just came off the night shift — I'm off in the mornings.'

Having gone through a Susceptibility Period himself, Xu Ze understood that in such a state one ought not to look too closely into the motives behind Lu Heyang's various behaviours — most of them were beyond his control. He was an Alpha, which was why Lu Heyang had only asked for a hand. If he had been an Omega — no, there was no if. An Omega could not have been here at all; during an Alpha's Susceptibility Period, every medical worker of the opposite sex had to be kept away.

Lu Heyang asked him, 'Not sleepy?'

'Not sleepy,' Xu Ze said.

'Then would Doctor Xu mind staying with me a few more minutes, and leaving once I've fallen asleep.' The pad of Lu Heyang's thumb rubbed slowly over the scars on Xu Ze's wrist. After a moment he added, 'If you can't wait, that's all right too.'

The second half of the sentence made Xu Ze freeze all at once. He opened his mouth but could not make a sound. After a long while he took a full breath in and out again, and answered quietly, 'I'll wait.'

The room fell quiet once more. This time Lu Heyang did not make Xu Ze wait long — within a few minutes the drug dragged him down into a heavy sleep.

Xu Ze still held Lu Heyang's hand, motionless, and kept it so for more than five minutes. Once he was certain Lu Heyang was truly asleep, he stood up very gently, leaned in close to the head of the bed, and with his other hand carefully touched Lu Heyang's cheek, the bridge of his nose, the corner of his mouth. He reached no real conclusion — fatter or thinner — and yet the touch alone was enough to set him at ease.

He sat back down in the chair and let himself go blank. The only tangible thing left to him was Lu Heyang's hand, like a rope holding him in place. Xu Ze folded forward onto the edge of the bed, and suddenly felt sleepy. His nose was close to the hands they still held between them; he leaned in a little further and pressed a kiss to the back of Lu Heyang's hand, then closed his eyes.

It had been a long time since he had wanted to sleep like this, and a long time since he had fallen asleep so quickly.

Of course he was woken just as quickly. Xu Ze was a light sleeper; the moment he heard the door open his eyes flew open. Lu Heyang was still asleep. Xu Ze drew his own hand out, little by little, then turned his head — a Beta nurse from the Endocrine Department had just arrived at the door of the room.

The nurse was clearly a little surprised to find a doctor still sitting by the bed; it was too dark to make out who it was, so she only nodded once at Xu Ze, picked up the tablet at the foot of the bed, and went to the instruments to record the readings.

Xu Ze rose, looked at Lu Heyang a few more times, then moved the chair back to where it had been and left the room.

Once he was in the corridor he checked his Mobile Phone and saw he had slept for only a little over twenty minutes. For a moment he considered not going back to the apartment to rest, but staying at the hospital seemed to serve no real purpose either — he would only keep wanting to go and look in on Lu Heyang, and that was not something he could do.

In the end Xu Ze decided to sign off and go home. He had only just reached the main hall when he ran into He Wei.

'Just come out of Heyang's room?' He Wei asked. 'How is he?'

'Asleep.'

'Don't tell me our Doctor Xu was the one who got the colonel off to sleep.' Hearing that Lu Heyang was already asleep, He Wei had no intention of disturbing him, and casually slung an arm around Xu Ze's shoulder as they walked out together. 'My friends have only just come back victorious from the war zone, and what happens — one of them doesn't even go home before going off to catch his wife, another one's in isolation in a hospital room because of his Susceptibility Period. Getting everyone together is hard.'

'Gu Colonel hasn't come back?' Xu Ze was possibly the person in the world most eager to repay a debt; he was still waiting for Gu Yunchi to return so that he could hand over the two million-plus.

'No, he flew straight from the war zone to another city. I told you ages ago he was going to lose his mind.'

Xu Ze nodded, thought for a moment, then asked, 'Are you getting married?'

From what Chi Jiahán had said, He Wei had sent him a wedding invitation. If it was true, then even though Xu Ze had not received one of his own, he still wanted to give He Wei a gift of money.

To this question He Wei neither asked who had told Xu Ze, nor answered it directly; he only smiled. 'Guess.'

'I don't know,' Xu Ze said.

'Mm-hm.' He Wei made a noncommittal sound and said nothing more.

Back at the apartment he could not rest properly either. After a short two-hour nap he went to the medical university early, and worked in the laboratory straight through until evening, only noticing it had gone dark when the project team called him over to order takeout with them.

'I still have to go back to the hospital. You go ahead and order.' Xu Ze saved his data and files, packed up his things.

When he reached 195 Hospital, Xu Ze did not even eat dinner; he changed into his white coat and went straight to the Endocrine Department, only to be told by the guard at the door that Lu Heyang had gone to a meeting.

Short of the country being on the brink of collapse, Xu Ze could not think of any meeting that would require Lu Heyang to attend in the middle of a severe Susceptibility Period.

'How long has he been gone?' Xu Ze asked.

The guard glanced at his watch. 'About two and a half hours.'

'All right. Thank you.'

Xu Ze stood at the door of the room for a while, and gradually felt a kind of blankness — he could not say what the point of being here was. Even if Lu Heyang were in the room right now, there was nothing he could do for him; the Inhibitors and the medication would all be brought by the Endocrine Department nurses.

There was still some time before the evening handover. Looking at the door of the room, Xu Ze decided that going to eat his dinner was probably the thing he ought to be doing.

He turned back toward the main hall. He had only taken a few steps when he heard a soft 'ding' behind him. Xu Ze turned around and saw the doors of the dedicated elevator at the end of the corridor slide open; six or seven Alphas in Air Force combat uniforms stepped out.

Lu Heyang walked in the middle of them, the brim of his training cap pulled very low, and what looked like a mask over the lower half of his face.

Only when they drew closer did Xu Ze see that it was not a mask — it was a pure black Bite Inhibitor.

Lu Heyang's hands were still sheathed in Restraining Gloves that limited the movement of his finger joints. He looked perfectly steady, with no outward sign of losing control — not in the speed of his walk, not in his movements. The only thing that could not be seen was his face, hidden entirely beneath the shadow of the cap brim and the Bite Inhibitor; the area where his eyes should have been looked fathomlessly deep.

The corridor was brightly lit, and the Alpha moved like a black fog that would not disperse — a thing with weight and substance. His great height was accompanied by a Pheromone that could not be concealed, and as he drew near it carried a pressure that made one hold one's breath.

Xu Ze stood rooted to the spot. Even though he could not see Lu Heyang's eyes, he was certain that Lu Heyang had looked at him for several seconds before walking through the door the guard had opened for him. That gaze almost had weight to it.

Only Lu Heyang went into the room; the rest of them stayed outside. Song Yuke rubbed his face with a touch of lingering fear, loosening his stiff muscles, and only then walked over to Xu Ze. 'Doctor Xu.'

'Was it an important meeting?' Xu Ze asked him.

'Yes. As some of the key military commanders from this Northern Theater operation, Gu Colonel is already absent — if the colonel had not gone it would not have looked good.' Song Yuke said, 'He took two Inhibitors in advance just to drag himself through to the end of the meeting. Now no medication can be used; we can only wait for the colonel to settle down on his own.'

Affected by Lu Heyang's Pheromone, and being an Alpha himself, Song Yuke's body was reacting with a strong rejection. He waved a hand at Xu Ze. 'I feel a bit like hitting something, Doctor Xu — let me go find the nurse and get hold of some Inhibitor first.'

'All right.' Xu Ze paused. 'Can I go into the room?'

'Huh?' Song Yuke did not register the question for a moment. 'But… it would be dangerous.'

Then again, the colonel alone in the room was dangerous too, and Xu Ze was also S-Class. Song Yuke began to waver. 'Should we wait for the Endocrine Department doctor to come?'

'It's all right.'

'Then okay. Doctor Xu, please be careful — come straight out if anything happens.'

Xu Ze nodded, turned the Wristband up to its highest setting, and pushed open the door of the room.

The curtains were still drawn tight, but every instrument and every movable hard object had already been cleared out of the room, and the silence was terrible. Once his eyes had adjusted a little, Xu Ze walked forward a few steps, his gaze going around the corner of the bathroom's outer wall, and saw a tall figure standing by the sofa in the sitting area.

'Colonel?' Xu Ze tried calling him. 'Shall I help you take the gloves off?'

He received no answer. After a moment's hesitation Xu Ze walked up to Lu Heyang and lifted his right hand. The end of the Restraining Gloves was connected to the Wristband; Xu Ze looked down, found the switch, pressed it, and opened the Wristband.

The glove was half off when Xu Ze was startled by something cold suddenly pressed against his neck, and froze on the spot.

Lu Heyang's head was bowed, the Bite Inhibitor resting against the side of Xu Ze's neck. Xu Ze was forced to tilt his head back a little; the skin there was made both cold and hot by the Bite Inhibitor and by Lu Heyang's heavy breathing. Xu Ze stood holding the glove, at a loss — and it was Lu Heyang himself who drew his hand out of the glove and raised it to press against the back of Xu Ze's neck.

The Pheromone came crashing down like a wave. Xu Ze did his best to steady his breathing. For years he had been taking his medication on a strict schedule, to correct the instability in his Pheromone brought on by his secondary differentiation, and for a very long stretch now he had not had a Susceptibility Period; his control over his Pheromone had reached the normal level for an S-Class.

Xu Ze was held in place by the Bite Inhibitor, which had moved from the side of his neck to his chin, and by Lu Heyang's hand — one in front, one behind. He tilted his head back to look at Lu Heyang's eyes, but could see nothing, only a deep black. Xu Ze reached up to touch the Bite Inhibitor, and slowly worked his way back to the position of the switch, asking with some difficulty, 'Do you know the password?'

The password on the Bite Inhibitor was there to prevent an Alpha from opening it himself; he had forgotten to ask Song Yuke for it before going in.

'Default password.' Lu Heyang spoke this time, his voice low. 'Try it.'

Unable to see a thing, Xu Ze used his fingertip to turn the combination dial — one, two, three — and with a click the Bite Inhibitor came open. Xu Ze took it off, and was still turning over in his mind the fact that Lu Heyang's other glove had not been removed.

'What did you come in for.' Lu Heyang's tone was calm.

'The Bite Inhibitor and the gloves… if they aren't taken off, it will be very uncomfortable.' Xu Ze could not read Lu Heyang's present state. He asked, 'Or, is there anything else I can do?'

'Can you do it.'

'I can.' Xu Ze went to find Lu Heyang's left hand, helped him take off the glove, and asked, 'What do you need me to do?'

Lu Heyang did not answer. He gripped Xu Ze's hand back and moved closer. There was a deliberate slowness to his movements, as though he were giving Xu Ze time to react — and Xu Ze did react, instinctively leaning back a little.

So Lu Heyang asked, 'Didn't you say you could.'

Xu Ze was silent for a few seconds. He let go, let the glove and the Bite Inhibitor drop onto the carpet, then put his arms around Lu Heyang's waist and raised his chin to kiss him.

Fate does not give the same person too many chances — Xu Ze knew that, especially for someone like himself. Drunk three months ago, in a Susceptibility Period three months later; there might not be a third encounter with a Lu Heyang who was not in his right mind.

Xu Ze, whose kissing was still clumsy, finally won the embrace he had wanted. Lu Heyang took off Xu Ze's glasses, took over from his unmethodical kiss, and drew him backwards until they reached the sofa, where he sat down. Xu Ze sat astride Lu Heyang, arms around his neck — the posture reminded Xu Ze of how, when Lu Heyang used to come to his home, he would, as a matter of course, pull Xu Ze onto his lap just like this.

……

He smelled blood, and could not tell whether it was the collarbone or somewhere else that had been broken open. In a soothing voice he said to Lu Heyang, 'Colonel, let me get down.'

……

After it was over, Xu Ze tried to stand, but Lu Heyang pulled him back onto his lap and kissed him again. Their tongues pressed against each other, tangled for several minutes. Sensing that Lu Heyang had grown calmer, Xu Ze lifted his head — it was already time for the shift handover, and he could not stay here any longer.

'I have to go back to work.' Xu Ze kissed the corner of Lu Heyang's mouth, his cheek, his forehead.

At the very end he stayed nose to nose with Lu Heyang, and said very softly, 'Forget this one too.'

Just as he had forgotten everything that came before — it was better not to remember.

Lu Heyang, like every Alpha in a Susceptibility Period who will not waste his strength on words, did not answer Xu Ze; he only picked up the glasses from beside him and placed them in Xu Ze's hand.

Before leaving the room, Xu Ze took a mask from his pocket and put it on, then opened the door.

'!' Song Yuke's face was a picture of shock. 'Doctor Xu… how… how are you bleeding?!'

Xu Ze looked down; the collarbone was indeed bleeding, and had soaked through his pale shirt. It was a rather startling sight.

'It's nothing. I'm going back to work first.'

'Did the colonel… did he hit you?' Song Yuke fell into step beside Xu Ze, saw that his white coat was wrinkled beyond recognition, and grew more alarmed — he suspected that Xu Ze's face might also have been beaten swollen, which would explain the mask. He spoke incoherently, 'I'm sorry, Doctor Xu, I didn't think it would be this bad… let me go with you and get it seen to.'

'It's all right,' Xu Ze said.

It took some effort to talk Song Yuke down. Xu Ze walked out of the special ward area on his own.

While waiting for the elevator he opened his Mobile Phone to check the time. The doors opened almost at once; Xu Ze closed the phone and looked up. A slender Omega stepped out, followed by a tall Alpha.

Xu Ze met the Alpha's eyes through his mask, then they passed each other. Xu Ze stepped into the elevator and pressed the button.

To him they were both people he had met only once; he might forget the exact shape of their faces, but the next time he ran into them he would know at once who they were.

The Omega was Lu Heyang's father, whom he had seen outside the private hospital; the Alpha was Lu Heyang's bodyguard, whom he had seen at the hotel.