Chapter 88: my heart will go on

Qingcheng Xie Hearing him say such words, he was stunned and did not know what kind of feeling he had.

He looked at Yu He, and for a long time, it was Yu He who dared not look him in the eye, because his eyes were too cold and too sharp, like a scalpel, which could cut the heart out.

But at this moment, the chaotic and intense emotions in Yu He's eyes were too heavy, like lava.

The blade is sharp, after all, mortal iron, can not withstand the high temperature of the lava.

So this time, it was Qingcheng Xie who turned his gaze away first.

He had mixed emotions, if Yu He usually spoke to him like this, he would not have reacted so much, but at this moment, he knew the meaning was different.

This turned out to be what Yu He wanted to tell him the most.

If they can't get out, if they die in an hour, these are some of the last things Yu He wants to say to him, to say goodbye to the world.

So the power of these words was heavy, hitting him straight in the heart.

Qingcheng Xie did not scold him, did not laugh at him - this is the first time since the night of the club, Qingcheng Xie faced Yu He's confession with this attitude.

But he didn't know how to get back to him.

After so many wrong love entanglements between them, Qingcheng Xie doesn't know how she can face Yu He's pathological dependence with her own attitude.

So he finally turned his eyes away, he swam to the side, close to the wall, tilted his head to focus on the studio dome getting closer and closer.

A little bit of broken light shone on his handsome pale face, he was frozen bloodless, like ice floes, even his lips were nearly transparent.

A dozen centimeters ...... and a dozen centimeters ......

It's getting closer.

Qingcheng Xie can already clearly see the dome's pipe steel plates, mortise and tenon nail heads.

He suddenly thought of something and looked down into the clear water - and then he found it.

"You wait for me."

Qingcheng Xie pushed the plastic box containing the phone to Yu He, saving the phone to flip into the water and completely scrap it, while he suddenly dove into the pool, his slender body cutting through the water waves. He dived straight down, and after a while, when he shook the water droplets from his hair and resurfaced from the bottom of the water, he had a discarded steel pipe in his hand.

More than a meter of pipe, held in the hand, with the current floating height, enough to touch the zenith.

Qingcheng Xie took the steel pipe and began to hold his breath as he knocked on the dome to test it.

The sound of the hollow panel is audible, and after knocking the buckle, the sound is far clearer and louder than the solid wall surface, which will make a hollow sound.

Qingcheng Xie tried calmly.

Yu He also stopped talking and watched as he tried the tube bit by bit from the side furthest from the door.

Inch by inch, minute by minute.

Solid.

Solid.

Still solid ......

"......"

Fifteen minutes later, Qingcheng Xie lowered the steel pipe he had used to test it. Now there is no need for the pipe, his own hands can already touch the dome.

But he didn't move anymore, his face hidden in the waves of water.

Yu He saw that his face was whiter than before -

There are no overhead floors.

The roof of this room, is cement pouring sealed tight ......

Even the most indifferent to life and death, when the hammer of death actually strikes down, it will still feel the tremor. The dome was sealed, meaning the last ray of hope for both of them was dashed.

Yu He looked at Qingcheng Xie's face, for a time even he also some breath suffocation. He swam over, tilted his head to observe the ceiling, now completely clear to see, before bringing them a ray of hope for the pipe mouth broken, although it is indeed a hollow wooden board, but the board above a layer of cement rock.

Relying on the strength of normal people, even a hundred years can not get out, not to mention only a few minutes left ......

It is really going to die like this.

" Qingcheng Xie ." Yu He looked at him, his throat was a little tight, that moment he had a lot to say, but the final exit was a, "What do you think tomorrow's newspaper headline ...... will write."

Qingcheng Xie tilted his head and once again looked at the ceiling that was getting closer and closer.

The sparkling, swirling water reflected his jawline, his hair was a little messy from being wet, the usual meticulous outline was still there, but some dark hair hung wetly in front of his eyes.

He did not answer Yu He's nonsensical question.

After a while, however, Yu He heard him whisper, "...... Yu He , a lot has happened between you and me."

"Those things are each mutually detrimental, one size fits all, but now it seems that at least one of them, I have to say sorry to you."

He suddenly said this, Yu He recoiled and was stunned for a moment: "...... I followed myself. It's not the same as the Canton Tower Archives, you don't have to blame yourself."

"I mean before that. Five years ago."

"......" Yu He was quiet for a moment, as if something was stirring in his heart, "...... you want to say so, I did not also do a lot to make you feel beastly behavior?"

Another said: "apologize to each other before death, but also really too sensible some - a lifetime of living so sensible rules, organized, you are also too tired."

He said, his heart, which had been tense for more than an hour, finally completely loosened up.

It is also resigned to life.

This death was an accident for Yu He, but death was never something he could not accept. He would not be frightened and confused in front of death, because in his short nineteen years of life, he had already faced pain and loneliness that were more terrible than death too many times.

He is a man who lives to die, and he has long known that death is his friend who has been waiting ahead to take him away since his birth, and with whom he always has to meet.

And this kind of death, compared to the madness in the asylum out of control, and finally and those cases of disease in front of the same miserable, undignified left, really is not something difficult to accept.

It does not scare a lonely man who has been crazy for seventeen years.

Yu He simply changed to a comfortable backstroke position and lay back down on the water, he picked up his phone and suddenly thought of something -

" Qingcheng Xie , you say, do we want to trust the manufacturer once."

This time it was Qingcheng Xie's turn to be stunned: "What?"

"It's waterproof." Yu He raised the phone, "Waiting for this water to completely cover us, the phone will also be submerged. But if the business is not so black-hearted, really waterproof, you say we both want to leave a suicide note or something ...... time is still ample, it is also considered not a thin fate."

He said, opening his phone memo.

Then clicked on the music playing software again.

Unlike Qingcheng Xie, Yu He is actually a romantic and sophisticated person, and if he really wants to be buried as a curiosity in the water, he has resigned himself to his fate and will want to meet his death with grace and ease.

"You know, before a death row inmate is injected, the people in prison will make them listen to a song, and the one with the highest on-demand rate, I hear, is 'Don't Look at Me Just a Sheep'."

Qingcheng Xie stood quietly floating in the water for a while, he probably didn't expect Yu He's posture in the face of death to be like this.

When people are born, they are still chaotic, they can't cry or laugh by themselves, and they come to this earth crying with a slap from the nurse.

But when people die, full of love and hate, knowledge, past ...... people will be with their own to the end of the invisible friends to say goodbye, Yu He may think, and old friends parted, should practice a sprinkle of smile to thank.

"Isn't it weird how death row inmates love to listen to 'Don't Look at Me Just Sheep'?"

Yu He swiped his phone screen and looked at the list of songs he had cached on it, while speaking more and more calmly.

"But in fact it was because they felt they were dying and were in little mood to choose, so they defaulted to the very first song, the letter A no, the first tune of the letter B, which is 'Don't Look at Me Just a Sheep'. If you ask me, they are still defeated by death - not even willing to give themselves a chance to die, really missing some beauty and courage. ...... By the way, I think this one is good, do you like it?"

He tapped the play button on the screen, the long musical sound floated out from the phone, lingering and classic, it was the song "my heart will go on".

Qingcheng Xie : "......"

"you jump, i jump."

"You're going to get out of here. You're going to go on......"

"Not here. not this night. not like this."

Yu He started jumbling his memorized lines with some light nasal sounds, the water around him was cold and the winter in the south of the Yangtze River was biting.

He laughed up, "How appropriate."

"You know, I was particularly fond of Rose when I was a kid, and I thought how dare she brave the accusing eyes of so many people and bleed through the worldly divides to be with that worthless poor boy? If a girl could do that to me, when the Titanic sank, I would have had her on the pontoon and me in the water."

"I don't want to watch her die."

"You know Rose later married, and she lived a happy life, and Titanic and Jack were like a dream in her long life, and when she woke up, her pillow frame was a picture of her riding a horse in her pants, just as Jack had described to her in the dream with a smile."

"It's good to have a dream like this ......" Yu He sighed, "I don't even have dreams anymore."

The song was long and far away, as if it was the sailing whistle of a bunker ship a hundred years ago, drifting through time and space, echoing in the closed and drowned studio.

Yu He listened to the song and opened the memo on his phone to write something.

But in the end he realized that his suicide note was meaningless, that he had no one in the world he particularly cared about - and if he did, that person was already with him. Only until he died, he still didn't know what his feelings and desires for Qingcheng Xie really meant.

He doesn't know what Qingcheng Xie has been hiding from himself in the past years.

It's all about bringing the regrets to let Mona give them to forget.

Yu He put the phone down and put it back in the plastic box. He closed his eyes and hummed softly, seemingly relieved, waiting for that moment to come.

The dome is closer ......

Just then, however, he heard the clear sound of water paddling.

He opened his eyes - it was Qingcheng Xie who moored up next to him and changed to the same, stretched out, reclining position as he did.

Qingcheng Xie also put the phone down.

Yu He was a bit surprised: "...... Don't you write something? To Xue Xie."

"It would only make her more upset to read it, and I don't want her to live her whole life with those last words I left behind. Sometimes last words aren't too tender things. My last call with her was very familial and was a good way to end it. If I had to choose, I didn't want to hurt her again with my own dying message."

Qingcheng Xie finished these words calmly.

In a sense, they are really the only two best partners on the road to the Yellow Springs.

They were all able to face their death very quietly and calmly, which most people in the world are unable to do.

Qingcheng Xie looked at the time on the phone, he and Yu He two people, just like water sprites floating silently, sea moon, peach blossom, rocket ......

The waves seem to be transformed into the jellyfish in the video that gently heal the heart.

"Every night in my dreams.

I see you.

I feel you.

That is how I know you go on......"

Every night, in my dreams, I can see you, I can sense you ......

That is, I know how you will go on ......

Yu He listened to the song playing on a loop and suddenly thought of the door that recurred in his dream world.

From the age of seven, to the age of fourteen, the door he had opened countless times.

From the age of fourteen, to the age of nineteen, the door he had dreamed of countless times.

When Qingcheng Xie was with him, he opened the door and could see the man standing by the window, tall and handsome, looking back at him quietly.

And when that door was empty inside, he closed his eyes and stood inside, as if he could also feel the traces of that doctor's presence ......

Dr. Xie said to him, "One day, you will have to get out of your inner shadow by yourself."

Qingcheng Xie writes with a pen in front of the writing desk by the window.

He wrote: "To Yu He, a gift from Qingcheng Xie."

Later, Qingcheng Xie left.

And since he left, on many nights, in many dreams, he actually dreamed of him.

Yu He's expression slowly relaxed as he lay in the cold water, but he knew he was not alone at this moment.

Qingcheng Xie is right next to him, he just needs to reach out his hand, he can touch that little bit of warmth that belongs to another person. The warmth that will not leave. The warmth that only death can take away.

"Once more you open the door

And you're here in my heart ......"

You push open that door again and

You are there, in my heart ......

In the song, the door skeletonized with the endless summer seemed to open once again, and inside was the light of summer, the snow of winter, the unchanging handsome silhouette of spring and autumn. It was as if he had never walked away from the room in his heart.

Yu He didn't know what kind of emotion was surging, sour and complicated, he suddenly wanted to cry, but he knew it wasn't because of death.

He suddenly couldn't resist the urge to speak, he suddenly couldn't resist the urge to give his hand to Qingcheng Xie.

He suddenly couldn't resist the urge to tell him, "Dr. Xie, Qingcheng Xie , I'm sorry."

It is clear that he just accused Qingcheng Xie of being boring and cheesy for apologizing before he died.

The words then stuck in my throat, neither up nor down.

But the hand has reached over and made ripples of the heart in the water, and then -

He held Qingcheng Xie's fingertips.

Qingcheng Xie's hand moved a little. But finally did not break away.

"...... Qingcheng Xie , don't you be afraid, death is not scary. I had several near-death experiences, you know, it was like falling asleep, faster and drier than falling asleep ......"

He opened his mouth but said something else, something more like a man should say.

He clutched Qingcheng Xie's hand tightly, and he felt some slight trembling in their hands, not knowing if it was because of himself or because of Qingcheng Xie.

"I'll stay with you."

"It's okay."

"...... I'm here with you ......"

Qingcheng Xie was silent, Yu He kept not looking at him, kept only looking at the ceiling which was getting closer and closer, and then whispered these words to him.

But he turned his face sideways and looked at Yu He.

He certainly knows that Yu He is not afraid of death, Yu He sometimes even desires death. However, at this moment, Yu He still seems to be a bit disappointed.

I'm relieved but I can't help but be frustrated.

Why?

Qingcheng Xie just looked at him silently for a while.

Eventually, he thought, he might know why ......

In the Titanic melody of romance spanning ninety years, in the face of impending death, his indestructible, never-breaking heart, finally loosened -

" Yu He ." Qingcheng Xie suddenly opened his mouth.

In the voice, there is a certain calmness that comes with a certain determination.

"Hmm?"

"Five years ago I left Huzhou First Hospital. I left you."

Qingcheng Xie said softly after a pause.

"There are indeed secrets."

"...... If this is the last truth I can restore, if this truth can release you at the end."

The surrounding area is too cold, the only dim light in the zenith, it seems to show a lonely blue, frosty between Qingcheng Xie's eyebrows, but Qingcheng Xie's eyebrows are not as cold as usual.

But he remained stoic.

Before the death that was destined to come soon, he finally let go.

He turned his face sideways, his eyelashes fluttering slightly, and the teenager who finally turned his head and looked at him in the same way said, "-then I'll tell you."