Chapter 46: Keeps fooling me

Yu He is indeed crazy.

It has been many days since the frightening night, he has actually been discharged from the hospital, but did not talk to anyone, nor did he return to the main house.

Now everyone in his eyes is disgusting, is hypocritical. He owns a flat in a new development in downtown Huzhou, and he doesn't go there much after he gets the keys, and at the moment he chooses to live there alone.

When he first saw Qingcheng Xie's videos, he was devastated, but when he came to his senses, he was not happy.

He wondered when he had calmed down a bit at the hospital if he could have misunderstood.

Could it be that the criminal gang has an ulterior motive and Qingcheng Xie's past has been taken out of context? Qingcheng Xie is not such a person.

With this expectation, with his last hope, he returned home - he wanted to confirm it himself, not to be disturbed by anyone.

What he didn't expect, however, was that the things that were turned up were far more brutal than the tip of the iceberg that he saw on the video.

The truth is horrible.

The deeper he looked into it, the sicker he became.

On the table were medications to control his condition, and he took a few of them and didn't touch them again.

Because it doesn't work at all.

The results of his personal investigation made his inner world collapse even more, and it is not something that can be controlled by some pills anymore. The heart is like a moss, the whole person's senses are numb, he wants to kill and want to devour blood, morality and law in his eyes suddenly become very worthless.

It is also true that life is nothing when the mental Bola Ai attack, a person is not afraid of death, will be afraid of what the rules of the game of society?

Yu He sat on the black single armchair, his cell phone rang many times, it was a message from Qingcheng Xie calling, but he didn't answer or read it.

He just raised his eyes and looked at a whole white wall in front of him.

With a height of more than five meters, the walls are as wide as a huge screen in a movie theater.

And at this moment, the wall is densely projected thousands of chat records.

-- this is all that is currently recoverable from cloud traces via black technology over the past many years -- Qingcheng Xie's private incoming and outgoing messages.

Information about Yu He.

Yu He is a top hacker, he has always had this sick ability, but having the ability does not necessarily mean that he will actually do something, just like there are many people in this society who have the ability to kill, but how many of them will become real murderers? There is a clear line in Yu He's heart, a line he has never crossed in the past.

But once you pry open the dusty door and step into it, only to see what a sight it is inside.

He looked at the blood was cold.

Although the time lapse is too long, the news recovery is crippled, but can get enough information has been sufficient.

From the earliest recoverable content, he saw that his father had paid Qingcheng Xie a high price to come and see him, but Qingcheng Xie was initially not so willing and said that case number 3 had died and had serious violent aggressive tendencies before he died, and although he sympathized with Yu He, he really did not want to spend his time on a long relationship with a mental Bola Ai patients for a long time.

"Caring for such patients is fruitless and doesn't make much sense. I want to use the time to do something more worthwhile with the subject."

Jiwei He sent him a message: " Yu He is different. He is still too young, and he and case number three must not go the same way. I know that mental Bola Ai disorder will not be unattractive to you, Dr. Xie, please, for the sake of my previous friendship with you, come to our home at least once to talk. Meet my son."

"Mr. He, I have other very important things to finish, and I don't really agree with the kind of companionship therapy that the other doctors and you are talking about. Maintaining a relationship with one doctor for a long time will make the patient dependent, and when the time comes, forcing the end of the treatment, just like drug rehabilitation, will instead affect the patient's emotional rebound more easily."

Jiwei He : "But there was nothing else I could do. That's all I can do to try."

"......"

"Dr. Xie, please, for my sake, will you at least see him once, please?"

It was so hard to come, and I begged and pleaded a thousand times.

What about the day of departure?

The day of departure -

Jiwei He : "Dr. Xie, you've decided to end this job after all."

"Yes."

"Beyond the contract, after all, there are human favors. You've always been good to Yu He, sometimes you even argue with me over him ......"

"Anyone else, I would have the same attitude. Because that's what I'm supposed to do when I get paid."

"But Yu He is already dependent on you, and you should know that."

"I've told He from the beginning that long-term companion therapy can have this effect on patients. This is actually all something we expected."

Jiwei He : "Dr. Xie, you are not the same to him ......"

Qingcheng Xie : "But he is the same as all patients to me."

"It doesn't make any difference."

The conversation isn't over yet.

Jiwei He said, " Qingcheng Xie, if you insist on leaving, I can't force you to stay, but the contract even if the early termination, we originally agreed to ten years. There are some remuneration that I promised you, so I can't honor them all."

Qingcheng Xie : "It's okay, I don't care."

Having said that, Jiwei He also understood that it was useless to talk to Qingcheng Xie anymore.

His message, after a long silence, became, "...... Then think about how to talk to him, you left too suddenly, always have to find a way to make him accept as soon as possible."

Qingcheng Xie's reply was crisp: "If you have no objection, I intend to tell him that the original term of the contract is seven years, so that he will feel more comfortable. But also need your cooperation."

"......"

"Qingcheng Xie, is there really no more room for negotiation in this matter? Ciyan Qin's incident has hit you so hard, do you have to be so desperate?"

"Mr. He, there's no such thing as never, it's a job."

"I can't, and never have, brought more than a few feelings with me."

"I have to leave my job."

"Can't wait for the contract to expire?"

"Can't."

"...... Qingcheng Xie , your heart as a person is really colder than I imagined."

"That was the kindest lie to him."

The glow of the city lights outside the window shimmered, the giant billboards kept changing, and the light reflected in Yu He's living room flowed like sparkling water, washing over the tens of thousands of messages projected on the walls.

The flowing water took away the lead, Yu He seems to see Qingcheng Xie's face only today.

His patience, equality, and acceptance of him were false.

It's reading from a book, it's a false and a false promise, it's a paper talk, it's coaxing him to deceive him.

Even the duration of the contract stated at the time of parting was not true.

At that time he really believed it.

Qingcheng Xie was determined to leave because the time had come.

So the truth is this ......

Decade.

Qingcheng Xie was supposed to stay with him until he graduated from high school.

But after the incident with Ciyan Qin, Qingcheng Xie decided to leave herself rather than cut her pay.

How scared is he?

He cheated on himself together with Jiwei He, yet he was able to be so calm and collected, reasoning so eloquently that it was a normal parting of a relationship.

The reasoning is all Qingcheng Xie's, and he is like an unintelligent, unreasonable clown.

It's so silly ......

It's all fake.

Fake!!!

Qingcheng Xie Those words that once supported him, gave him strength in the pain of his illness, and allowed him to struggle to guard his heart, were indeed just the words of a psychiatrist speaking to a patient.

It's like a surgeon telling a patient with terminal cancer, "You have to hang in there and there will be hope."

In fact, the doctor knew in his heart that there was no hope.

It's also as if the police are advising young people who want to die lightly: "You don't look bad! What makes you think that? Everyone is unique, there will always be someone who likes you, come on down and give me your hand!"

But that the police is really can not see the ugly face of the light-hearted boy, the fat dumb body?

That's just the most vain comfort.

Qingcheng Xie's medical philosophy, the philosophy that led him to society, had given him ten years of inner support, and even when Qingcheng Xie finally chose to leave, Yu He did not hold a grudge against him.

He tried his best to understand what Qingcheng Xie said, to understand the end of the relationship between normal people and normal people, as Qingcheng Xie called it.

He finally reconciled with Qingcheng Xie's choice and with himself.

But to my surprise, these are not Qingcheng Xie's true words.

Just a doctor's treatment with some pretty words.

Even the duration of the contract he told himself was fabricated.

He couldn't help but think of Qingcheng Xie and himself eating in the cafeteria when they met a gay couple, both of whom were so uncomfortable at that time that they got up and changed places.

He was a bit surprised and asked Qingcheng Xie, aren't you a doctor, how come you can't see it too?

But Qingcheng Xie said to him at that time that medical philosophy and personal ideas are two separate things.

As a doctor, he does not see any psychological problems with homosexuality, but as a person, Qingcheng Xie cannot accept such same-sex relationships emotionally.

So now Yu He also sees it clearly.

As a doctor, Qingcheng Xie is willing to guide him towards society and treat him as a normal person.

But as Qingcheng Xie, he did not establish any relationship with him, he not only himself away from him - Yu He could not help but remember that Qingcheng Xie also once asked Xue Xie to stay away from him.

Qingcheng Xie was afraid, he fled, he preferred not to be paid more, but also to keep him and his loved ones, all distanced from himself ......

Yu He leaned back in the armchair and watched the scene in front of him with his face propped up.

He slowly smiled, his lips were thin, and the curve on the hook was a bit treacherous when viewed from the side.

"You doctors, are you that hypocritical?"

He whispered softly, murmuring to the empty white wall in front of him.

The wound on the shoulder is still bandaged, blood seeping out, vaguely some dull and heavy pain, snake venom-like spread down the scar to the fingertips, the heart.

"What a nice human skin on you ...... Qingcheng Xie ."

Yu He felt at this moment that all those things he had done before were just like a joke, what with restraining his heart and what with getting rid of the control of the disease.

What was he trying to do, what was he clinging to, and what was he believing in all these years?

He slowly closed his eyes, and in addition to the gunshot wound on his shoulder, the scars on his wrist seemed to be aching vaguely.

He thought, "How can Qingcheng Xie be so hypocritical? A pair of hands blindfolded him and let him follow in ignorance for so long.

He said to him that it is not terrible to have a disease.

He told him that he could cry out in pain and ask for candy, and no one would laugh at him.

He knocked on his hardened heart word by word, he had thought Qingcheng Xie reached out to him with a pair of warm hands, but it turned out that it was just a cold knife.

Yu He protected himself well, but Qingcheng Xie's knife went deep into his heart.

It's so sad.

Yu He has lived for nineteen years, wearing a tightly woven false face, never saying anything true to anyone, and never getting too sincere words from others.

During these 19 years of illness, only Qingcheng Xie had asked him one question -

"Don't you hurt?"

Don't you hurt ......

Yu He slowly stood up from between the armchair, raised his hand and pressed it against his heart.

He looked at the cold information spread out in front of him, like a bone-chilling wind and snow blowing head-on, he lowered his head, bowed down, and slowly smiled ......

It's funny how he seems to, literally, feel the horror of pain.

Is this pain?

Associated with deception, with futile efforts, with his folly and loneliness.

If this is the case, he would rather have been numb all the time, what is wrong with being a grass? Why should go to be lie to put the heart?

He went through page by page, sheet by sheet, article by article, word by word, every word seemed to cut in his heart knife. He thought his heart had a thick cocoon, but this moment it hurts as if even the flesh and blood skin does not belong to him ...... not to himself ......

Yu He raised his hand and touched it to his forehead, his fingertips were cold, his limbs were numb, he knew enough already, he suddenly got up and swept away everything on the coffee table in front of him almost tyrannically.

The debris clattered all over the floor!

He gasped, to find the projection remote, he lifted it up, he was going to close this Duola Pan's magic box-!

However ......

Just then, he saw a message belonging to Xue Xie in the nebula-like explosion of messages.

Sent six years ago.

The day of his birthday.

"Brother, Aunt Lai is sick, I'm hanging with her, when will you be back from your business trip? These procedures in the hospital are messy, my head is big, if only you were here ......"

When Yu He first saw this message, he felt that something had gently tugged at his mind, like a moth falling on a spider's web, and he didn't react at first.

But a few seconds over, he looked up suddenly, incredulously at the message, the moths stuck to the cobwebs began to struggle frantically, fluttering, wings vibrating off phosphorus powder, flapping up a mountain of memory -

Six years ago?

His birthday?

That Day ......

Wasn't Xue Xie with him that day?!!!